Christmas - Part 2

I just got back from The Big D for my second Christmas. My dad is on his 4th marriage, and I really hope this one sticks. I really love my step-mom Linda. She's really sweet, she's a great cook, and she came with 5 adorable grandsons. I get to spend more time with Hunter and Zachary because Brennar, Graeme, and Lleyton live several states away. I think it's a really fortunate thing when there's a blended family and everyone gets along. My step-brother and step-sister and their spouses are great, and I enjoy spending time with them. They're all funny and smart and interesting, and they have those great kids.

Hunter and Brennar are both almost 10. They play games on the PSP against each other when they're both at their own houses and I was asking them about it. Of course it's all above my head, because sometime in the last couple of years, I've gotten old and out of it when it comes to computery things. Kind of, anyway. Anyway, Hunter said that someone inappropriate tried to join one of their games. I asked how they were being inappropriate. Brennar said the person said a swear word, and Hunter added that the person had the A-word as part of his screen name. I asked what they did about it, and Brennar said they just turned off their PSPs. I was proud of them for the way they handled it. They recognized that this might be a person they might not want to associate with, they did what they needed to do by getting out of the situation, and they weren't total geeks about it. I kind of loved that they told me the story at all.

The boys gave me some great presents. I got a fantastic smelling Yankee Candle, some Christmas decorations, some soft fuzzy socks (which I love!), some tea from India in a hand-carved box and a sterling silver tea infuser (I'm sure Diane would be jealous). Obviously for two 9 year-old boys, two 5 year-old boys, and a 3 year-old boy, they have terrific taste and gift-buying skills! My sister-in-law was India during the terror attacks back in November and was quarantined in her hotel for 2 days, so the fact that she was able to get the presents her boys asked her to get for me while she was there is really quite amazing! Also, we're glad that she's okay.

Here are some pictures of the boys:

Brennar, Zachary, and Hunter playing with Legos at my Dad's house.

Zachary

Graeme

Lleyton (he's got a little scraped nose from where he fell last week)

Naturally I spent some time with my nieces Alex and Brianna while I was there too. It was pretty much a Camp Rock day on Saturday. If we weren't listening to the soundtrack, we were watching the movie. I'm uploading a video I made of them doing their version of "This Is Me" to YouTube right now, and I'll post it here when it's all done because it's too cute. Alex has memorized every single move from the movie. Brianna has really tried, but she mostly spends the time running in circles around Alex. If only I had that kind of energy! They're sharing a room now (they got bunk beds), and what was Brianna's room is now a play room. Here they are peeking out the end of their bed.

Christmas - Part 1

Christmas is (almost) over. I’m always astounded at how long it takes to prepare the meal and clean up after it, but how little time it actually takes to consume. I seriously thought I would be washing dishes all afternoon. And, my grandmother insists on having this tub in the sink and doing the dishes in there. I’ve tried to take it out and wash dishes like a normal person (or at least a normal person who doesn’t own a dishwasher), but she gets all bent out of shape when I do it. So, when the water starts getting cold, it’s not as simple as pulling out the drain plug, you have to lift up this outrageously heavy tub and tilt it just right so that you don’t spill cold dirty water all over the countertop. And, really? We need to have the dish to cook it in, the dish to serve it in, and then the dish to store it in? Really? Three dishes for green peas that nobody but I ate anyway? That seems excessive. Not to mention washing the silver and the fancy dishes before and after the meal. I’m a simple girl. Give me red plastic plates and flatware any day! But, my aunt points out that we don’t know how many more years Granny will be able to serve dinner, so we need to just suck it up and do it the way she wants. Um? Thanks Anne! Way to bring down Christmas.

And…I just realized I wrote a whole paragraph about washing dishes. That’s exciting stuff! Moving on…

I was supposed to head to The Big D on Tuesday night, but Daddy told me to wait until Wednesday morning and get a good night’s sleep. Happy to do it! I got to Daddy and Linda’s house around 1pm on Christmas Eve, and for the first Christmas Eve that I remember Daddy didn’t have to drag me around town on 50,000 last minute errands. We had absolutely nothing to do except sit around the house and sneak pieces of ham! When we were growing up, Sissy and I would be sitting at Granny Dink’s window watching for his car on Christmas Eve. He would get there and bring in tons of plastic bags with our presents in them. He would pause to kiss us hello, then he’d lock himself in Granny Dink’s bedroom for at least an hour while he wrapped everything. Even up until last year, we were wrapping presents for Linda, among other things. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wrapped my own gifts from him. Not this year! I actually played on the internet for a while Christmas Eve because there was nothing left to do.

My step-sister and her family came by before going to church on Christmas Eve and sang Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer to us like they were real carolers. My nephew Hunter was kind of bashful and was hiding his face. My nephew Zachary was smiling from ear to ear, and staring at me the whole time. The boys and I tracked Santa on the NORAD website while they were there. I showed them the movies that different countries had made of when Santa visited them. Zachary said he saw Santa waving at him in the Paris video. Also, Hunter, who has a crush on Taylor Swift, informed me that I had the wrong title of her song. It’s not Romeo and Juliet, it’s Love Story. Take that, Aunt Mel!

The next morning I went over to my sister’s house to see what Santa had brought my nieces Alex and Brianna. They both got a new bike, they got a big indoors playhouse to share, and a bunch of smaller stuff. Alex got a “rudio” A what? I asked. “A rudio! A rudio!” What is a rudio? I asked. “You know what a rudio is!” I hated to admit I really did not know what a rudio was. Turns out a rudio is actually a radio, and it plays the Camp Rock and Jonas Brothers cds she got too. Brianna’s hair looked funny and when I asked why, Cori said she had walked into the living room the other day and there were chunks of golden hair on the floor lying beside a pair of scissors. Brianna gave herself a little shag haircut. Isn’t that nice?

Then it was over to my Granny’s house to do all of that pre-dinner washing up . It was about 70 degrees outside and about 125 degrees inside. Anne and I opened all of the windows, which got all under Granny’s skin. We plan for this. We all come to Christmas layered in clothing because we know it’s going to feel like a boiler room in the house, and we can peel off clothes as needed. Being 70 degrees anyway, we could only layer so much this year, so we really had nothing to take off. Granny stood in the middle of the living room floor and proclaimed: It is December! What does that mean, we all asked. She said, It means it’s supposed to be warm inside because it’s cold outside. Well, one, it wasn’t cold outside; and two, it’s not supposed to be so warm we would be uncomfortable in tank tops and shorts, really. Other than the heat issue, which is nothing new, Christmas day was nice and relatively drama free. And, I didn’t even spill a whole bowl of banana pudding before anyone could eat it this year!! So, yay for me!

I go back to The Big D for Christmas, part 2 next weekend when my step-brother and his family come to town. Then Christmas 2008 will be officially over, and 2009 can begin.

Oh Christmas Tree

I almost didn't put up a Christmas tree this year because it seemed like such a bother to unpack the boxes, put the lights on the tree, and then just a few weeks later take it all down and put it away again. But, I love my ornaments, so I got sentimental about wanting to see them. I can remember where I got each one of them, who gave them to me, or what made me buy them. I've got a balloon ornament that was given to me at an apartment complex I used to work at because every morning I blew up balloons and tied them to our sign to attract new residents. I've got several little ballerina ornaments because I used to be a dancer. I love ornaments shaped like Santa heads. I've got wooden ones, metal ones, glass ones and plastic ones. I've got a couple of black and white cat ornaments that look like my old cat Monster. I've got tons of elephants and several polar bears because they're my two favorite animals. And, I've a lot of other animal ornaments too: birds, rabbits, lions (I'm a Leo), butterflies, and bears.

So, here's my Christmas tree, and some of my favorite ornaments:

My favorite ornament: a little fat glass owl with a wreath around his neck. I got him at Harrods on my trip to England a few years ago. I fell in love with him.

This is how brilliant my goddaughter Ryan is: she was only 4 months old when she addressed this envelope ornament! It always sits front and center on my tree.

I got these gingerbread man and woman ornaments after Christmas one year at a little craft store. I thought they were adorable.

Thanksgiving Lemming

Getting it in right under the wire...

I’ve been wondering whether I should do a Thanksgiving post. Everyone else is probably doing one. But, if everyone else was jumping off a cliff, would I? Obviously yes.

Firstly, I’ll state the obvious: I’m thankful for my family and friends, even though they drive me a little nuts sometimes. Does the second part of that sentence cancel out the first part? Maybe I should say I’m thankful for my family and friends, period. Nah, that doesn’t sound right. I AM thankful for them even though they drive me a little nuts sometimes. They wouldn’t be my family and friends if they didn’t. You know who you are, stop trying to hide behind the people that don’t drive me nuts! They’re not nearly as important to me.

It’s been a pretty rough year, but there are some things I’m thankful for:

• Hard decisions made and out of the way. Now I can get past it.
• Funny things my nieces say. They can cheer me up like no other people. For examples, use that little search tool at the top of the page to search for nervous, Toys R Us, Christopher Columbus, and dammit.
• Laughing until my cheeks hurt: thirty minutes into watching Lifehouse on Soundstage, Diane says, “He sounds like somebody.” The chorus of the song starts, she nods sagely, “Oh, he sounds like himself.” And, I'm the dork?
• Walking into my bedroom and seeing my goddaughter’s American Girl doll Josephina’s clothes for the day laid out on the end of my bed. And her food, made from cut out pieces of paper, on my dresser. She’s growing up, but she’s still a little girl too.
• July 4th weekend at Virginia Beach with the family for Craig’s wedding. The fantastic pool. Anne’s, Cori’s and my synchronized drowning, uh, I mean swimming. Aunt Sue flying out of the water slide at the hotel, the look on her face and her sunglasses flying off. Floam all over the place. The freakin’ keys to the hotel room. Fireworks at Mt. Trashmore. Craigie and Jessica being so happy!
• My 9 year-old nephew still being enough of a little boy to choose to sit so close to me on the sofa that you couldn’t even fit a playing card between us, my 5 year-old nephew being so jealous of it that he had to sit on my lap to be even closer, and the game of who has the stinkiest feet that followed.
• Being forgiven for a 20 year old hurt.
• My MP3 player. All those songs in the size of a gum pack - one of the best inventions ever.
• US Men’s Olympic Swim Team. Um, yeah. ‘Nuf said.
• Ricky Gervais and Steve Correll at the Emmys. The one funny part.
• Dr. Pepper. Always thankful for Dr. Pepper.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!

This is my favorite Halloween joke:

A little boy was trick-or-treating. A man answered his door and after the little boy asked “Trick or treat?” the man gave him candy and asked, “What are you supposed to be?”

The little boy said, “I’m a birate!”

The man said, “A what?”

The boy answered, “I’m a BIRATE! A BIRATE!!”

The man said, “Oh… Well, If you’re a pirate, then where are your buccaneers?”

The little boy pointed to the side of his head and said, “Here are my buccaneers, where are your bucceneyes?”

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When I was a senior in high school and my sister Sissy a freshman, we were dating best friends, Bill and Jason. They had planned a big surprise for us one Friday night, and Sissy and I were so excited all week looking forward to it. The boys had cleared whatever they were going to do with our mom, and we were supposed to dress up for whatever it was. (You know, khakis instead of jeans.) Why it didn’t occur to us that this surprise was happening on Halloween and might be a little suspect because of that, I have no idea.

Friday night came. We took our baby sister trick-or-treating, then came home to get ready for our dates. Bill, my boyfriend, called at the last minute to say that he had been grounded, but my sister’s boyfriend Jason was going to take care of our surprise for both of them. I was so disappointed, but I got ready anyway because Bill said I’d still enjoy it, even without him there.

All ready for our big surprise, Sissy and I sat in the living room waiting for Jason to come pick us up. Momma and our step-dad Dennis were back in their room watching tv. It kept getting later and later, and we didn’t hear anything at all from Jason. We took turns going to Momma and Dennis and checking to make sure it was still okay that we could go out. It was getting close to 11pm and we couldn’t believe that they had given permission for us (especially Sissy at only 14) to START a date that late. I never had a curfew as long as they knew where I was and who I was with, and Sissy was usually okay if she was with me, but still…

Momma came in the living room and asked us to go out to our van and get her box of cross-stitch supplies. I volunteered, but she said the box was really heavy and that it would probably take both of us to lift it. So, we went outside and opened the back door to the van. We started to lift the box and realized that it wasn’t heavy at all. We both started to say something about Momma being nuts because of how light the box was, but before either of us could get the whole sentence out of our mouths, a man jumped up from the backseat. He was wearing a mask and was yelling. It scared the crap out of both of us! Sissy started screaming at the top of her lungs and ran about 3 feet into the yard before turning around to face us and scream bloody murder again. She had her hands up at her face like she wanted to cover her eyes and make it all go away, and her mouth was wide open in terror.

I, on the other hand, reached up, grabbed the guy by the collar of his shirt, dragged him over the backseat, threw him onto the driveway, and started kicking the bejebus out of him. As I was kicking him, I was yelling at Sissy to get inside the house and call the police. She took off running towards the front door and I just kept on kicking. The guy was still in the mask, lying in the fetal position on our driveway with his hands covering as much of his head as he could manage. Our mom came out of the house before Sissy even made it to the door. When she saw what I was doing, she started yelling, “Stop kicking him! You’re hurting him, Melanie! It’s Jason! It’s just Jason!” It took me a few seconds to register what she was saying (and to stop kicking).

So, THAT was our big surprise. Our boyfriends were going to scare the living daylights out of us, and our mother was in on it. We were so lucky! And, we had to dress up for it too. Nice! Jason ended up COVERED in bruises from my kicks. He wasn’t a huge guy, maybe 5’10” and he was a skinny little thing, but I’m only 5’2” (in shoes) and I only weighed about 90 pounds at the time. I don’t know for sure what I would have done if Bill had been there too, but I learned I definitely have the fight part of the fight-or-flight-or-freeze response. And I’m REALLY strong when it kicks in!

So, don’t mess with me! :P* * * * *